So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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