I wish I could teleport
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
It's just like the Real World with babies
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
