So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
