remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
