Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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