We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize