i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You smell like stripper and shame
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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