Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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