"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Randomize
