Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Two words: blizzard sex
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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