Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
