At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
