he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize