He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
