I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
