Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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