So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
