You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
