I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
