my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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