marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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