I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
