If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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