I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
