I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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