Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
