kristin has been a bad kristin
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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