Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
