The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
