Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
