butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
