i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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