1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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