My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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