I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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