I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize
