i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
