What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Randomize
