so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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