i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
