He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
