Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
