It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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