problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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