cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
how drunk are you?
Several
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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