I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
