I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
