I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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