you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
