i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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